she takes my breath away.
i remember sitting across from her and grinning like there was no tomorrow. my face was frozen in a smile. listening to her talk about past loves, and crazy stories. she ate almost twice as much as i did. nachos. a gigantic burger. and then. she asked me what i would most like to be doing right then. i so badly wanted to say "i want to be holding you so tightly. i want to kiss you. and call you mine". i think i came out with "what do YOU want to be doing right now?". and she said. in true d form. "sitting on the couch watching hockey". and she paused. and i said. "well, that's what i would want most to be doing too. watching hockey. in sweaty p's. with you."
that was bold. then.
we walked. she grabbed my hand. or i grabbed hers. at the playground, i thought it would happen. that we would finally kiss. i chased her up and down slides and stairs. we regrouped at the picnic table, so close we were touching.
and then it was time to leave. i grabbed her hand this time. i remember. and she asked me why. why i liked to hold her hand so much. how can you answer a question like that? because you are the moon and stars and sun to me. because i look at you and melt. because you challenge me to know how i feel. and why. and because you care. you want to know those answers.
the next day she told me about her dream. of us snowboarding. sitting by the fire with a glass of red. i was in her arms, in the dream, she said. and she was playing with my hair. it sounded just about perfect to me.
i knew i would get that. someday.